Let me start by saying;

Facebook mom groups are important.

They provide support, sometimes instantly, to moms in need of advice, tips or a person to vent to. For many moms, these online groups are the only way they talk to other adults during their days.  They give you people to talk to, debate with and solidify the choices you've made as a parent.

But if you're in them, you already know. There are downsides.

Judgemental "Support"

While some have great intentions, it's frequently known that mom groups are the perfect place to get bashed for a parenting choice you've made. Even if you're in a group about maybe, VBAC's, one wrong statement and you're asking for a day or two worth of antagonizing comments. Don't even think to bring up circumcision or vaccines. It can spiral fast and be pretty damaging and hurtful, even if its not intended. In the end, we're all humans and moms. Those words can really sting. 

Bad Advice 

This is a big one. I've seen flat out dangerous advice given to mothers. If you have pregnancy concerns or concerns with your baby or kiddo, its really important to reach out to an expert. If you want your breastfeeding relationship to thrive, finding someone who is trained to support mothers in breastfeeding support, like La Leche League of Meadville or La Leche League of Erie PA or a local IBCLC is a better bet. If you want to know what formula to switch to, talk to your doctor about what options and types they suggest. There are so many resources at your fingertips. I know it may feel like you're an inconvenience sometimes or your issue is small but its not. The resources are there for you to use them. 

So what's the alternative? 

In Person Support 

Most moms are pretty nervous to branch out and actually go to an in person mom group or activity with a bunch of strangers, with an unpredictable kid or kids. Please, take my advice, just try it. Even once. Its the best. Human connection with other mothers in person is so unbelievably different than Facebook. I've met some of my dearest "mom" friends at the various support groups in our communities. These groups can be a fantastic way to get out of the house, gives your kids interactions with other kids and lets you form the friendships you've been longing for. Its kind of like mom friend dating and there's sure to be the perfect one for you! If you need more information on popular mom support groups and activities in our area, contact us! 

Call Your Doula 

Did you know that from the time you sign a contract with Northwest PA Doulas until you're postpartum with your baby, we are on call to chat with you 24/7? (And that means texts, phone calls and Facetime... thought we may look a bit haggard for a 3am Facetime call.) Have a totally weird question that you feel embarrassed to ask elsewhere? Trust me when I say, we've already been asked by someone else... and we know the answer. If we don't, we're excited that we've made professional connections within the community so that we can get you the correct answer. 

The point of this blog is this: 

Its great to be in Facebook mom groups. But they shouldn't be your only place to obtain support, information and comfort in your parenting journey.

In person support or even chatting on the phone with a trusted friend can really be all you need to feel confident, excited, refreshed and ready to parent your baby.